I tried to prolong our conversation despite him rushing to join his friend at the food court. And so he stopped repeatedly at the door as I sort of prevented him from leaving so soon. I told him that I understand that he has cut contact with me. He thinks its the best thing for both of us- to not contact each other for now. He added that we'll probably contact each other again a few months later or even years later. Perhaps 5 years later. He said he knew that I tried texting and calling him recently. I wondered if he was talking about the most recent one and whether he has seen my text. He said I should know best. I told him that my Trusts paper was a disaster. He just told me to study hard and wished me all the best.
I told him that I'm sorry for the last time. He said sorry too. I said I'm really sorry for the last words I've said albeit my grievances, which caused all my family and friends to worry. It is something which I've regretted a lot and my comeuppance for my irrational and irresponsible behaviour was to lose him as a treasured friend. I should not have imposed emotional blackmail on anyone. He said he accepted my apology and felt glad that I am now ok and responsible for my actions. When he said we'll probably only contact each other years later, I repeated "years later?". He said we should not bargain and the best thing for now is to leave things as it is. He said he really had to go and meet his friend for dinner. I can see his friend/colleague/gym buddy sitting at the end of the food court waiting for him to come. I know I've been holding Jx back. I asked him if this was inconvenient and the obvious reply from him was a yes.
The last thing I told Jx was that I really treasured our friendship and enjoyed the 2 dates with him. I really liked how we could joke about things and "Emma". His last words were all the best and he went off to join his friend who waited patiently for him. When he approached his friend, they stood up and left the food court by exiting the back door. Slowly later, I went to that direction. When I opened the door, all I could see was an empty space somewhat like a courtyard, overlooking it is the Ministry's building. They were out of sight. I don't know where they headed to and I can't see them from any corner. Sadly I left the campus. I'm happy that I bumped into him, at the same time sad that there still exists a glass barricade. But all I know for now is that I can only pray for him to succeed in life, and in my heart, he'll always be my treasured friend.
Let me share with everyone a youtube video from the movie LOL. It's known as the "Somewhere Only We Know" scene. I didn't watch the full movie on HBO or anything. Neither am I a fan of any of them including Miley Cyrus, though I admit that I like the old Miley compared to the new wild one. This may be a tribute to the once beautiful Miley. I like this scene a lot as it is sentimental and it brings back a lot of memories. The lyrics fit the mood I'm in now and I feel the same way. Perhaps the best description of what we're going through is "Somewhere only we know". I choose to remember, and at least I know.
No comments:
Post a Comment